11 Days...

I have an appointment with my attorney tomorrow afternoon and, if all goes well, I will be signing papers by the end of the week... I'm so excited, I just can't wait to have this all over with...
It's my last week at work... I'm very sad about that. I love my job and I hate leaving. I love the people there... Even if some of them get on my nerves at times. I wish I could pack my job up and bring it with me.
I packed three huge suitcases yesterday. The worst part of that is that it was only maybe half of my clothes... That's scary. I plan to have a yardsale and scale down quite a bit once I get down there...
Well, time to go for now... Talk to you soon.

12 Days...

12 days until I'm back in Georgia... Seems so near and so far at the same time. Luckily, I have work this week to keep me somewhat preoccupied, but that's not really true because I've given my entire workload out to my assistants and I'm really only playing supervisor and putting out fires as they come along.
Yesterday, to pass the time, I threw out a ton of things that I'll have no use for anymore... Today, I'm going to pack some things. I figure if I pack today and a little every evening this week, it should make things a lot easier for the move.
I'm trying to make a checklist now of different things to make sure I get done... Like getting the boys' medical records, Micheal's school records, Mack's medical records, and goodness knows what else.
Well, I'm going to get going for now... Talk to you all soon.

Rough day...

We came to an agreement on child support today. I have to say that it hurt me to the core... $45 a week. That's $22.50 per kid, $180 a month, and a whole $2,340 a year... I lost my mind and called Gary to scream at him when I first got that email, but while on the phone I realized that, hey, this is what I want, I don't need him or his money to take care of me and my children, this is my out. So, I'm taking it, this way he can say that his piddly little $45 a week is supporting his children and I can simply be out of the trauma that I have experienced with him...
Well, I'm gonna go. I'm really excited about knowing that I will be back home in two weeks, but I am exhausted today...

Holding it together...

There seem to be days lately where I am just holding it together and not much else. Yesterday was one of those days... I went to my parenting class, which is basically a $50 joke designed to make parents feel bad about getting a divorce, then they turn around and tell you that everything will be okay. I was surrounded by people talking about their boyfriends and girlfriends and future plans for marraige and all I could think was "HELLOOOOOO... Have you lost your minds? You're in a divorce seminar! Didn't you learn your lesson the first time? Why don't you at least give yourself some time to heal and process? At least for your kids..." And I did say something to that affect once which had the teacher proud of me and the rest of the people attending the seminar quite unhappy...
Back to the holding it together thing. After I got home from this thing, I ate some lunch and talked to the neighbor for a bit. Then Gary came back early. He wanted to talk about his therapy session and "us". There are many times that I want to scream that there is no "us" we're getting divorced. But I didn't, I tried to listen... Then I walked out. After so many years of being mistreated, all I can hear when he talks "Lie lie lie lie lie lie lie lie lie lie..." and I grow very tired of listening to it.
Well, I've gotta run now, talk to you all soon...

Working out...

Okay, so I'll admit it, I let myself get out of shape... Way out of shape. I have at times been a size zero, but the norm was a two... After Micheal, I was somewhere between a two and a four, depending on the cut of the jeans. After Kyle, it was a four, the two just was not happening. I stayed a four up until about a year and a half ago, maybe not that long... The fours started getting tight, I dealt with it, just sucked my gut in and kept going. Well, that stopped working... I broke down and bought two pairs of size six pants. I've been living in those, and I'm not very proud of it. See, in all reality, a six is still small, but to be as short as I am, a six looks big to me. I'm not happy when I look in the mirror right now... So, I decided to do what I can to improve that. On top of tanning, I'm going to start working out... And I'm going to try to diet. Try is the key word there because food just looks so good. And with the divorce right now and being low on cash, I'm just always willing to take what's given to me which isn't necessarily the healthiest options.
My goal is to be back in a four, and be fit, by summer so that I can wear one of my old bikinis. Who knows, I may try for a two... A two would be very nice.

Boring and uneventful...

That pretty much describes my day... Nothing happened at work. Kaylynn and I pretty much counted down the hours today until it was time to leave. It's funny how the last hour, we go back and forth with the exact minutes until time to go on instant messenger. That's how boring the end of the day is...
Kaylynn did, however, clue me in on the best tanning salon I've ever been to today. We went after work and it was so nice to just lay in a tanning bed and relax. Unfortunately, the clock went off and I had to get out... But there's always tomorrow, and everyday until I leave for Georgia. :)
Talk to you all later...

I went shopping...

I forgot to post yesterday that I went shopping... I couldn't afford to buy a lot, but it was nice to be able to shop for myself without having to worry about someone breathing down my neck about it when I got back to the house. I even saw a few things for my new place that I'm thinking of buying... Since Micheal was born, I haven't been able to do this because I always had to listen to how we can't afford it. It was nice to be able to make that decision for myself for once, and it's not like I went hog wild, I bought an outfit and a purse and did a lot of window shopping...
My next purchase will be bedding for myself in my new place and decor. I'm fairly excited. I also get to buy furniture... This will be the first time I've ever bought furniture, Gary did all of that before...
Well, talk to you all later...